Blogging Again....

One of my favorite mugs.  It is a copy of a social security card with: Social Insecurity on it. The bottom says "Unemployed but not unloved!" Its my life. I found my life for $1 at a PDX Goodwill.

Welcome to the paradoxical world of my unemployment complete with privilege, frustration, ostensible optimism and lurking pessimism! 

Some of you have been saying “Write More!”  This initial post is me writing, in a lovely PG rated way, about how *you* can successfully manage my unemployment.

For the most part, my family, friends and contacts are beyond awesome.  People send me job listings, set me up with their friends, inquire about openings on my behalf, etc.  It is truly humbling. 

However, every now and then someone will try to indicate that I, and people of my ilk, are not doing every. little. thing. to find a job.  Trust, most of us are doing as much as we can.

    

Here are a few things you can generally avoid saying to your under and unemployed loved ones when they break down and want to wallow for a bit:

1.  At least you’re not (older, taking care of three children, a young girl in a warzone…). 

I have many faults and flaws.  The inability to keep things in perspective is not one of them.  I know that my situation is much better than many people who are unemployed and underemployed. I’m relatively young, well educated and able bodied. I have the right tools: a laptop, professional contacts, appropriate clothing and work experience. I manage to network frequently and pick up occasional pro bono work.  While I don’t collect unemployment, I saved up enough to forgo assistance for at least the next few months. 

However, if I require assistance, I have exceptionally supportive family and friends who possess both financial and cultural capital. I can name a dozen cities around the world where people would allow me to stay with them, either free of cost or simply covering utilities, until I found a job. 

It is highly unlikely that I will ever have to apply for SNAP (food stamps), stay in a shelter, panhandle or enter the sex trade.  

I am very lucky indeed.  I remind myself of my fortunate circumstances in order to stay relatively optimistic as I seek employment. In fact, when speaking about my unemployment, I often mention how lucky I am and how much worse it could be. 

Nonetheless, depression, frustration and anger creep in at times. Dark thoughts are unavoidable.  When they descend, the fact that my situation is favorable in comparison to most is not a comfort.  I have three degrees from top ranked schools. I speak another language. I’m published. I’ve been:

• An attorney (immigration)
•  A CEO minion (marketing, writing, editing, cultural competence, research, organization)
• A substitute teacher (K-12, Spanish, English, History, Special Ed)
• A research assistant to an internationally recognized/world renowned refugee law expert (pulling and analyzing legislation from Australia to Zimbabwe. Word.)
• An organizer for an international conference (you need to order dozens of kanelbullar, arrange travel from Galway, IR to Lund, SE and draft a letter to the Cameroon consulate formally inviting attendees? I am your woman)
• A legal intern (immigration, family law, criminal law)
•  A barista (admittedly my latte art is less than spectacular)
• A server (My waitressing experiences have gifted me with an affected British accent that would put Madonna to shame; the same goes for Southern accents and James Van Der Beek)
• A sales associate (at GAP and Sally Beauty Supply... they were the WORST jobs 5:30 AM openings and overdosing underaged boyfriends... have to remember to write a future blog post on those...)
• An administrative assistant (I can organize office supplies like no one’s business while simultaneously quashing the desire to STEAL EVERYTHING from gel pens to brightly colored paper clips to tiny post it notes…)
• A volunteer tutor for immigrants (citizenship test), high school students (SATs, English) and children (homework) for approximately a dozen years (beginning when I was 15 and continuing until I was 28 when I picked up pro bono legal work, I still edit the odd college student's paper every now and then).

And I have yet to find full time employment in my field of preference.  That probably sounds specific but my “field of preference” is public interest work.  Legal work. Advocacy work. Research. Writing.  

 I entered both college and law school determined to embark on a career whose purpose was to improve conditions for vulnerable, marginalized and disenfranchised people. Quite simply, all I have ever wanted to do is to make a living wage by helping some else’s life become more bearable, if not better.  The fact I am unable to do so is frustrating at times. 

When I express this (and such outbursts are rare), then is not the time to remind me I am not in Syria, have not been shot in the head by the Taliban, do not have children, am not 65, etc. I already know that.  And that knowledge does not provide any sort of relief to my acute frustration and/or depression.

2      Have you tried (networking, temp agencies, law firms, McDonalds…)

The answer is yes unless it appears futile.  I have sent out more than 200 cover letters in the past three years (two of which I spent with sporadic employment).  I have tried temp agencies, legal staffing agencies and employment agencies.  I have been a barista with a juris doctor and an LLM and I was happy doing it.  In fact, I’d feel downright lucky now to work a service job and do pro bono on the side. 

Regardless of what various Gawker commenters seem to think, however, most places are not going to hire someone they think will leave when the first opportunity arises. Many service jobs are not an option for me and not because I wouldn’t work at Target, Macy’s, Chipotle, Starbucks etc.  I don’t have that particular brand of pride.  My gram always said “all work is honorable” and I genuinely believe that.  None of the work I mentioned is “beneath me.” However, where many in the service/temp industry are concerned, my education and experiences make me “over qualified.”

Why don't you just sell out?

Ok, people don’t say that but knowing me its what they mean. Look, if I thought I was an actual viable candidate for private law, I’d apply to firms more often.  I have applied to a few small shops over the years and received nary a nibble.  I simply cannot imagine being attractive to Big Law.  Ninety percent of my legal work has been working with low income undocumented migrants and victims of violence.  I have never drafted a contract, written a will, helped someone declare bankruptcy or litigated anything. If you ask me a question about tax law, I will burst into tears and then into flames.  I am so out of touch with the private law sphere that I am currently in the process of re-learning to walk in heels (snazzy ballet flats, riding boots and cowboy boots alllll the way in Portland).

I have worked in the private sector for an insurance company and it was actually enjoyable.  Being a contract employee was great because I wasn’t worried about job security.  I said what I meant and meant what I said.  I didn’t sugar coat or soft pedal.  I could push my own agenda.  It was liberating.  If the opportunity arose, I would certainly do something like that again.  Nonetheless, opportunities to work in the private sector have been slim at best.  

Bottom Line: in order to successfully sell out, someone has to want to buy your goods.  I am not Ciara to Big Law's Petey Pablo.  Big Law does not want my goodies.

      You should be willing to do anything/anywhere

I think a recession sometimes drains people of empathy.  Americans operate under this “pick yourself up by your bootstraps” myth.  Of course, that doesn’t work when economy has removed your boots and is beating you over the head with them.  It also doesn’t apply if you were never in possession of a pair of boots.

So, let’s combat a few nasty, troll like thoughts:

• Americans are generally not poor because they want to be. 
• The overwhelming majority of people do not sign up for SNAP (food stamps) and other benefits to abuse the system. 
• Someone who does not want to take crazy drastic measures for the mere possibility of a job is not failing themselves and/or their families. 
• Very few people “deserve” to be unemployed. 

Most of us are doing pretty much whatever we can to find tolerable work as opposed to interesting work, fulfilling work or even profitable work.  That doesn’t mean we have to employ the shotgun method of applying for jobs.   

The two most annoying things that have been said to me include:

“You should move to X, take the bar there and looks for jobs."

In my under and unemployment I have applied to jobs in the following states/countries:  

•       Arizona
•       California
•       Connecticut
•       Florida
•       Georgia
•       Illinois
•       Louisiana
•       Maryland
•       Massachusetts
•       Michigan
•       Minnesota
•       Nevada
•       New Jersey
•       New York
•       Oregon
•       Pennsylvania
•       Texas
•       Washington
•      Washington DC
•      Ireland
•  Afghanistan (I admit to turning this down only after being warned off by some special ops guys referred to me by T whose connections are b-a-n-a-n-a-s. For the record, the hotel I would have stayed in was bombed)
•    The United Kingdom
•     Spain
•       The Netherlands
•       Hong Kong

Its not like I've been narrowing the field to an unreasonable degree. Mostly I've avoided those square states in the middle (sorry!), places where I know nary a soul and places where I could do everything right and still wind up in pieces by the side of the road.

As a fairly young, unencumbered (read: perpetually single) person, I had the benefit of being able to choose where I would be unemployed. Most of my friends and family are on the East Coast and I see myself in this part of the world for the long haul.  This is especially true since I never meant to stay in Portland for longer than a summer (ha!).  

I left the relative comfort of Portland for DC because I felt lazy and un-ambitious in Portland.  It also seemed to be the “right time.” One of my part time positions ended. The other was definitely not enough to live on though it may have become a possibility for a full time position.  The prospect of full time employment was a little dicey since I developed a few moral and ethical concerns regarding the organization but that is neither here nor there because... I desperately wanted to be back on the East Coast.

I thought about it and even though I am admitted in NY, I decided on DC. I think of all of the cities in the United States, DC provides me with the best possibility of enjoying a long, dynamic legal career.  Everything is here: domestic and international NGOs, secular and religious non profits, the federal government, think tanks, lobbying firms…you name it.  I’ve also had the benefit of living here before, during a 3L law school clinic so I knew I liked the city.  DC also has three very important things that NYC is missing, namely:

•  Lots of huge grocery stores in the actual city
• Eastern Market
•  NANDOS

Of course, I am prepared to leave DC for the right opportunity.  New York, for example, has Maoz.  However, I don’t think I need to move to North Dakota – a place I have never even visited and that has neither a Nandos nor a Maoz - and take their bar because unemployment is lower there.  

“You should be willing and ready to apply for whatever legal employment table scraps are available.” 

Look, there is really only one thing I can definitively say I do not want to do in the public interest sphere: Criminal Law.  I was an intern for legal clinics that partially focused on criminal law for two consecutive summers.  It was emotionally draining, frustrating and not especially interesting. Criminal law is the legal equivalent of a microwaved soy nugget for me: deeply unsatisfying albeit potentially nourishing.  Unless the position is related to immigration, I’m not keen to apply for criminal law jobs. 

If my fortunate circumstances are such that I can currently afford to skip over those types of job listings, I am perfectly okay with that.  I may come back to them.  I may not.  The fact I am not applying for these jobs does not mean I need a lecture on how to be an independent adult.

***

Now my this harangue doesn’t mean I think people should NEVER ask me about the job hunt or unemployment etc.  I hit my friends and family up for networking contacts, cover letter reviews and resume edits on the regular (thanks!) so it would be odd to then say, “Meh, I don’t want to talk about this.” I certainly don’t mind helpful suggestions of job sites, resume formats, organizations where I can volunteer etc. We can talk about those things, just spare me the condescension accompanied by implications of inflexibility and/or laziness. I prefer helpful suggestions, encouragement and financed pity brunches/dinners/happy hours.